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04 Nov 2009 12:55
11.04.2009kim has a black eye
Last month the Kardashian family agreed to auction off boxing matches to raise money for the Dream Foundation, a charity that grants final wishes to terminally ill patients. At least that’s the story.
When you hear what actually happened, this sounds more like someone had an extremely successful plan to beat up all the Kardashians, because she was left with a black eye and her younger brother was beaten unconscious.
On her website, Kim writes…
“The event itself was absolutely insane!! We literally had three days of training to prepare for the event and thought it would be a little bit of fun to raise money for one of our favorite charities. We didn’t expect what happened. When Rob stepped in the ring to fight, his opponent was at least 25 lbs heavier than him, even though the organization had assured us that they were screening the people we were fighting against. At one point Rob’s mask fell off and when he put his hands down he got hit in the face and ended up in hospital with a concussion.”
There’s something weird about this. Look how happy Kim looks in her cute pink outfit and her big pillowy gloves. Now look at her opponent. Kim looks like a dog learning to swim when she fights, while the monster in black seems to be under the impression that her kids are dead and Kim is the one who did it. I don’t know what evil genius orchestrated all this, I just pray they don’t turn on me next.
11.04.2009angelina has a new movie
It’s been mentioned before, but Nicole Kidman was originally cast and even did some filming as Brad Pitts wife in ‘Mr. and Mrs. Smith’. Then she got hurt, dropped out, Catherine Zeta Jones said no, and Angelina Jolie was cast.
‘Salt’ was written for a male lead and was about to film with Tom Cruise as the star before he had to drop out. Then Angelina said she would do it, and the producers pretended not to stare at her tits as they squealed with delight.
The point to this is that Hollywood is run by fuckin retards. Even though this bootleg ‘Salt’ trailer is in Russian, Jolie is perfect. Kidman would have sucked as Mrs. Smith. You don’t need to be a spy to kick her ass, you just need to be a sunny day. Tom Cruise is 30 inches tall. You could just throw a blanket over him, or take his gun and put it on the top shelf. Angelina however probably could kick my ass, mostly because I would cum in my pants while we were wrestling.
It’s nice to see that the foppish dandies who run GQ over in England are just as snooty and dim witted as the ones over here in the Colonies. Nicole Kidman usually gives boring interviews because she’s a dullard, but in this one she actually hinted at something interesting. “Well that’s enough of that,” the GQ reporter thought to himself. “A big star and her sex fetishes? Boooor-ing!”
The Daily Mail says…
But in one of her most revealing-ever interviews, Nicole Kidman let slip how her experiences of love ranged from ‘mundane’ marriage to ‘strange sexual fetish stuff’. The 42-year-old actress, currently married to country singer Keith Urban, said her life had been about exploring different types of love.
‘I’ve explored obsession. I’ve explored loss and love in terms of being in a grief-stricken place, I’ve explored strange sexual fetish stuff, I’ve explored the mundane aspect of marriage, and monogamy,’ she said.And that’s the last we hear of any sex talk. Not that Nicole Kidman is so great or anything, but if she had a hot Asian girl shoving things into her ass while Tom sat in the corner and cried, I wanna hear about it. Even if she didn’t do that I wanna hear about it. In fact, if Nicole Kidman could make up a bunch of super detailed lesbian sex stories, that would really help me out.
(theres like a hundred screencap pics of kidman getting naked in ‘eyes wide shut’ here. if you save them then click fast enough, it’s like a movie)
11.04.2009holy shit!
I like Radar Online more than TMZ because Radar doesn’t blatantly steal content from me like TMZ does, so I’m glad they’re the one who got this exclusive audio of Lindsay in the middle of a complete break down.
This clip of her on the phone comes from her dad of course, who says he’s releasing this as proof of Lindsays fragile mental state. It’s somehow supposed to persuade her to go to rehab, although it’s not clear how piling more pressure on someone already on the edge helps in any way. If you were standing between a big mean bear and her cub, Michael Lohan would say, “okay now whack the bear cub with a stick. Okay now call it a fag. I think this will help.”
As the tape begins, someone says “Go to sleep bitch. Die motherfucker die.” But that’s because I left my iTunes on and the Em song ‘Go To Sleep’ was playing. Once I turned that off, Lindsay says,
“I’m not someone who is gonna go to someone else when they’re like, constantly (inaudible) the only person that they’re there for and that’s not what I have, and I want to so much.
(after this she cries uncontrollably for about 5 seconds)
“Just ‘cause they’re caring more than the other side. And so mommy says that I’m like you were, and then she’s like, defending, and so she says to me on the phone, she doesn’t back me, she doesn’t stand by me.”
(after this she again cries loudly)
Why?
Why?
I’m fine.
No one cares about me. They don’t by the way. No one cares about that much.
It’s never about that. It’s about how they feel, not how I feel.
No, it’s not about me. It’s never about me. Unless I fight for it.To be honest I have no idea WTF she’s talking about. When someone is crying uncontrollably on the phone it’s hard to know what they’re trying to say. At least that’s what girls tell me after they turn me down for a second date and I beg them for another chance. Don’t do this! I can change! Please … I love you!
11.04.2009wwtdd.com news/updates
K, so talking about the page on the page seems pretentious and stupid, so I’m putting it all under the cut. And to bribe you into reading all that, at the end there’s a short collection of pictures celebrating September Playmate and her unthinkably perfect ass. I call dibs!
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